Tribute to Morrison's

Dear Blog: Three weeks ago we found out that our dear neighbor and friend had cancer. WHAT? HOW DID THIS HAPPEN I inquired? Just last week Bob was replacing some weather coverings on his roof and was full of life and now he lay on his couch, hardly able to carry on a conversation, he gets so winded. NO details. We don't know anything. Bob started losing feeling in his legs so he went in to get that checked. CANCER!
Two weeks ago: Bob gets oxygen and the type of cancer is confirmed: lung cancer. What can we do to help? Please let us help you, I cry. You have always done so much for us it's the least we can do. Bob is crying too. He doesn't want to impose on us. "Too bad"! I say. We are helping. Corinne, his wife, broke her back several years ago and can't drive or vacuum or stand for too long. Bob was her primary care giver. NOW WHAT? I demand to help- and they finally relent. I get to do their grocery shopping, clean their house and Reece gets to mow the lawn. They insist on paying for the cleaning and mowing, even though i made these really cute all inclusive service coupons for her birthday gift, and encouraged her to redeem them. They don't understand how important performing these acts of service (although they are paying) are to me. They also don't understand Why? Why would I, the busy mother of three make time to serve them. Well, let me tell you.....
Nine years ago when we bought our house Bob came over the first day he saw us. He told us he helped the previous owners with all their maintenance needs so he knew our house like the back of his hand. if we needed help he was there. Who knew that initial encounter would blossom into such a friendship. In the last nine years Bob has helped us do more and borrow more (he has every tool for any job) than I can count. Bob is 83 and if he hasn't seen it or doesn't know how to fix it then watch out. It probably can't be done. Every year Bob grows "us" a garden. Jelly belly's are kept stocked so my kids and any other neighborhood kids that tag along- can come over for a sugary treat. Trey has his very own special stash of suckers as Bob and Corinne didn't want to risk Trey ingesting a peanut butter jelly belly (he has severe food allergies). No one else gets suckers except Trey. Who DOES that? Bob.
This week: Oncologist delivers the horrible news: two months, maybe less. hospice came today for the first time and it was very overwhelming for Bob. They mixed up his medicines, talked to fast, talked to Corinne and NOT him. He is frustrated and sad and I cry when I am over there. I tell him that we are so sorry and that we love him. Bob has family and they live around the area and they are helping BUT i want to help too. I want them to know how much they mean to us. I will try not to impose too much but helping them gives me a sense of purpose right now. It makes me feel like what I am doing matters. I don't get that same feeling from serving  my own family (cooking dinner, doing laundry, scrubbing toilets, grocery shopping). I don't know why. Maybe it's because my family expects those acts and aren't so appreciative. Feeling appreciated and valued.......Isn't that every stay at home mom's plight? I digress......
no pictures. Bob says he's not having his picture taken for anything!  i asked him if i can come over and orally record some of his family history (he is always telling stories). NO- no one cares about my life is his response. i wish he would change his mind. i try to explain to him that generations to come will care. then i reminisce about my ancestors. do i care about their lives? not right now but i may in the future, when i have more time. what if i made the time? what could i learn from their histories? I digress......
funeral arrangements  have been made and quinn, only quinn, is to handle all the details. this service will be hard for quinn but Bob's family will be in good hands. quinn is good at his job. two months is too generous. bob has deteriorated so quickly already in just 3 weeks. i have literally witnessed the life being sucked out of him. he has no fight in his eyes. i think just worry for Corinne. Bob is a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints but hasn't been active for over 63+ years. This makes me sad too. does he know that after he passes through mortality his son, that died at age 19, will meet him? does he know that when Corinne's turn on earth is over he will meet her again? do they know that sacred ordinances can be performed on earth that will bind their family for eternity? I digress......
Tonight: Corinne couldn't find one of the medications she needed to give Bob. Hospice is coming tomorrow to review everything. I tell her I can come tomorrow while hospice is there and listen to the instructions and then at night if she can't remember i can help her. she indulges me and says i can come over all the while Bob is yelling in the background something about why would a mother of 3 want to burn herself out on two old people.....BLAH BLAH BLAH.
Well Bob let me tell you.........what goes around comes around. and that includes acts of service.

busy day

today was a busy day.
7:30 a.m.- woke up.
made my bed and said morning prayers.
woke up children.
made breakfast
made q's lunch.
drove morning carpool duty.
went to gym
registered reece for middle school
wallowed in depression upon realizing i am middle age!
went thrift store shopping with a friend
visited bob and corinne- more on them later.
made semi dinner for kids.
took reece to football practice.
volunteered to be team mom because no one else would.
went grocery shopping
read stories to q and t
threatened children if they didn't get in bed
in between all the activities i made various phone calls. entertained various thoughts. yelled at my children because i felt overwhelmed. ate too much junk because i felt overwhelmed. and then i wondered......how am i going to fit grad school into this life? what part of this schedule am i willing to let go of? will my yelling increase or decrease? will i end up gaining 20 pounds? is grad school really right for me and my family?

The tipping point......

the tipping point is actually the title of a really good book. the book touches on how "small and purposeful" actions can create huge results. one example the book cites is a study conducted on the new york city, subway, crime rates.  once upon a time, crime was prevalent in new york city. even more so on the subway. have you ever wondered how the city got that rate to plummet? who was the mastermind? according to the author (which i can't recall and am too lazy to go out to the car and get the book) several people and actions were responsible for this phenomenon.A bunch of ordinary people (with extraordinary minds) got together and realized that if they don't get the crime rate under control they are going to have really BIG problems down the road. these folks implemented several small and purposeful solutions (if you want to know more- read the book) which resulted in the crime rate, on the subway, decreasing by double digits. HUGE SUCCESS! so how does the tipping point apply to my life............
well i have a problem. the spirituality in my home is too low. the chaos and contention-too high. if i don't get this under control i will  potentially have some major problems down the road. so what small and purposeful actions can be implemented that might generate some BIG results. 1. limit all and any media time- i'm not saying do away with the computer or x-box or television but what if we limit our exposure to 2 hours total each day. if i get creative the kiddos might not even realize they are missing electronics. 2. increase amount of time spent on spiritual activities- again i am not talking hours and hours but what might happen if we just read 2 more verses in the scriptures each night or for that matter make sure we read faithfully EVERY night. 3. i need to wake-up earlier so i am prepared before the kids stumble out of their beds. - again i think 15 minutes earlier might do the trick.  my hypothesis is that by implementing these 3 small but purposeful strategies i will 1. be able to reduce the chaos and contention and 2. increase the spirituality in my home.  and this might just be the tipping point that put my family on a different path than we are currently walking.

Father Time take a time out

Geesh- i can't believe how fast time is zooming by. i can hardly catch my breath. quincy starts 1st grade tomorrow (actually she started yesterday and this is the first chance i've had to get back to this post). reece enters middle school 8.30 and trey and i are just trying to figure everything out. i keep thinking that once the kiddos are back in school time will slow down a little but then i looked at my calendar and september is already planned- the full month. then there's october- it's already half way planned and  then, well november and december are already history. oh and i called BSU to inquire about getting my MSW and if i want to apply for the fall semester of 2011 my application is due by early jan- which, is right around the corner! ARGHHHH! anyway here are some of the pics from the peterson family camp out. quinn is quite the guy. isn't camping supposed to be relaxing?  at our camp we were up with the sun-eating breakfast-exploring the mountains-hiking-riding ATV's and not hitting the tent until about midnight or later. when i got home- i seriously felt like i had been run over by a freight truck.

Right before my very eyes

I don't know how it happened. How did I miss this little man growing from this.....

to this......

Reece turned 11 today! his baby pic's are MIA- They're probably pre-digital camera.  I just can't believe that he's 11! WOW! He is evolving into quite the young man. Just a few tidbits about Reece.....
-he loves to be the life of the party. making people laugh is his speciality.
-he loves to read.
-he loves football and someday wants to play for the BSU broncos
-he already has a goal to serve a full time mission for our church (the Church of Jesus Christ of Latterday Saints)
-he has a tender heart. he doesn't ever want to hurt someone's feelings
-he is very tolerant.
-he is a fun older brother.
-his favorite pastime is hanging out with the family
-his least favorite way to spend time is singing in church
-his favorite food is anything-he's not a picky eater

i am blessed to have the opportunity to mother this child. he tries my every last nerve and patience thus stretching me and growing me in ways otherwise not possible. he was born for greatness. he is strong and i love him very much. happy birthday reser!

A thorn in my side!

i guess there has to be thorns to enjoy the roses right?  i give too much power to other people and allow them to get under my skin and become real thorns in my side. this is something i'm working on. i don't want to spend any of my energy on people i don't jive with. but it's hard. i tend to stew over things, get other people's opinion on the thorns, use time replaying incidents in my head, etc. i guess the truth is- it hurts to think that another person wouldn't adore me? you know appreciate all my good qualities while overlooking my faults. i guess that's part of life. on a more cheerful note......i'm dusting off the running shoes after a 10 week hiatus. the hip feels good and it's time to get back out there. i'm not looking forward to building up my base but hopefully it won't take long.

I'm Back

WOW my one week hiatus turned into several. My apologies-future generations-for letting time get away from me like that. I regret to inform you that I still can't change the background of this darn blog, or figure out any other tech savvy features of blogger. I went to a blogging conference and heard all sorts of fantastic information on SEO, html, word press, blogger in draft, etc. But by the time I finally got around to applying some of that info to this blog.....well let's just say i am short term memory challenged. so here's a synopsis of last few months:
I turned 36-totally depressed about that! i mean completely depressed!
Quinn turned 39- since he rarely verbalizes his feelings i have no idea how he felt about this
I ran my second half marathon- and injured myself pretty bad. it's been almost 10 weeks and i still haven't been able to run- i'm hoping next week brings some good news.
Quincy graduated from Kindergarten
Reece graduated from 5th grade-he's onto middle school in the fall

I hosted a family reunion type event- all of my siblings except one brother (good thing his wife and kiddos love us- they came w/o him) because he had to run his pharmacy. Of course I have no pictures of this event- who had time to take any pictures. I was busy entertaining 12 kids and 7 adults (truth be told: i have a knack for always missing the important touches, ie- pictures of a family reunion that will probably never happen again)